An End to an Eventful Year
A Brief Review of 2022
It could have been worse John. A lot worse.
Ray Arnold, Jurassic Park
A lot can be said of this year, but no one would dare call it uneventful. I can say the same for my personal life, where it has been an eventful year. While this year wasn’t as bad as 2002, when my parents separated, or 2016, when my dad’s second marriage collapsed, it certainly wasn’t my best year. Yet, as 2022 ends, I approach 2023 with some trepidation and excitement about how this year will change my life.
Professionally, this has been an excellent year. This year started slow, but I eventually found several colleagues I will work with for decades in the conservative policy world and developed my credentials in defense policy with NDIA and the American Security Project. By May, I put HKS behind me by skipping my graduation and moving to Washington, DC, fulfilling part of my lifelong work to serve the United States. After a well-earned vacation, I restarted my corporate life as a consultant at Bain and Company, where I became a value add to my team and our aerospace and defense practice. Yet while I worked for Bain in the daytime, by night, I was working on building further ties among conservatives from debate societies to happy hours (which there are many in this town). This led me to write my article with The National Interest and started a chain of events that is still ongoing. By the end of the year, I am more established among my peers, though I still have a long way to go before becoming an insider. I shall keep you all updated as my professional life grows in the coming year.
Unfortunately, my personal life was more of a mixed bag for me. I’ve had a few friendships end badly, and I regret how they ended looking back. I also wasn’t as happy as I wrapped up my last semester in Harvard, partly because of stress but also because I did not enjoy my time in HKS. But honestly, those were largely manageable compared to what happened later this year. If you live in Denver, you may have heard about what happened with my father, but to those who do not know, my father was charged with a very serious crime that I still feel uncomfortable discussing outside my family. While those charges were eventually dismissed without prejudice, I still believe he committed the crime, given his harmful behavior toward my family and me. To make matters worse, my stepmother and father are fighting in court over custody of my sister, which is a direct repetition of what happened between my parents and me years ago. My relationship with my father has been deteriorating for years, though this event broke what was left between us. On September 30th, I cut off ties with him after a brief 20-second fight over the phone. Eventually, I had to cut off ties with his side of the family, given they were nasty to my stepmother and supportive of my father’s behavior. I don’t regret cutting off ties with my father, but I feel bad that my sister now has to live through the hell that I went through.
Life, however, took a very interesting turn for me. As my relationship with my father was dying, my relationship with my biological mother was rejuvenating. In February, I decided I wanted to have a relationship with my mother again and reached out with the encouragement of a few friends and even my stepmother. Before, we hadn’t spoken for nearly ten years, and most of my friends did not know her existence. However, I realized I wanted to have a good and healthy relationship with at least one of my biological parents. I also realized that while she did some harmful things in the past, she cared for me and had the best intentions (even though the execution was terrible at times). When we first spoke on the phone, we both cried as my mother had her son again, and I finally forgave her for what happened between us. I cannot tell you how liberating it felt to finally let go of what happened between us and start a new relationship. Since then, she has visited my house in Washington, and we’ve spoken almost every Sunday. That is not to say that our relationship is perfect, and I will always have my relationship with my stepmother, but it is great to have my mother in my life again.
So what does 2023 have in store for all of me? I have no clue. What I know is that there will be tough days ahead, whether it is political or personal in nature. However, I know there will also be bright days when all my hard work will be rewarded with effort and a little luck. I hope there will be more good days than bad, but I can never know for sure until I live through it. Of course, there is no guarantee that next year will be better, as many worldwide can attest to when they greeted 2022. Yet despite all that happened this year, I greet the next with enthusiasm that tomorrow will be the start of a brighter future for myself and my country.
I hope you all have a Happy New Year and thank you for your readership.